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What, me cynical?

Apparently, there is a movement afoot to abolish tipping in restaurants, and we are supposed to believe this is a good thing for the employees involved. The theory is that restaurant should pay their employees a living wage, increase their prices to cover that cost, and we can then all be happy, knowing that we both needn’t tip and needn’t worry that our waitresses kids are going to bed hungry. Apparently, this is the way it’s done in Europe, so it’s about time we did it here.

But this is America, the home of Wal-Mart, the company that gets a federal subsidy by paying its employees so little they qualify for food stamps. So let me tell you how this is likely to play out, assuming the movement gains momentum. At first, it will happen pretty much as advertised. Prices will go up, along with wages. Once Americans are trained to not tip, and come to expect that their servers are being properly paid by their employers, employers will start to squeeze their employees. After all, it may take $15.00 an hour to come close to a living wage, but except in places like San Francisco, there’s no law that says you have to pay that much, and, if I, the restaurant owner, want to make money for myself, the logical place to look is at the outrageously high amounts I’m now paying my employees, which can surely be cut, because if they don’t like it, they can always quit, and I can find someone else who will work for minimum wage. This will especially be the case in the chain restaurants, which will likely be the first places to apply the squeeze.

Personally, I’d humbly suggest that any restaurant with a no-tipping policy be required to post the minimum amount it is paying its employees on an hourly basis, so those of us who actually give a damn about whether the person serving us is making a reasonable amount of money can make an informed decision about whether we should continue patronizing the place.

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