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Some things in life are bad…and now we’re losing MAD

Saturday, July 13, 2019

It’s almost enough to make you swear and curse.

All things must pass, but that doesn’t mean we have to like it.

Grieve with me then, for the passing of MAD Magazine, which is about to publish its last monthly issue.

I grew up with MAD, and I owe the gang of idiots a debt of gratitude for helping to steer me in the right direction, politically. For a subtext of all that satire was a distinctly liberal world view. I remember, as a ten year old, wondering why they seemed to love to make fun of Richard Nixon all the time, even after he lost the presidential race in 1960. Sure, I was a Kennedy fan, since I came from a Democratic family, and besides he was a Catholic, and at that point in my life I was still holding fast to Pascal’s wager. But back then there were good people who were also Republicans. I know that’s hard to believe, but it’s true. I was too young to remember the Checkers speech, or the red-baiting, but thanks, in part, to MAD, by the time 1968 rolled around, and we were faced with the prospect of a Nixon presidency, I knew that he represented an existential threat to our republic. Obviously, many of my non-MAD reading contemporaries did not. Sure they made fun of JFK too, but not in the barbed fashion in which they went after Nixon and his ilk.

It wasn’t just Nixon, of course, Beneath all the satire was an underlying philosophy of tolerance and mutual acceptance. Everyone was equally absurd. They made fun of everyone, but they hated no one, except people like Nixon, of course. After all, neither the White Spy nor the Black Spy was the good guy. They were both idiots. My guess is that their target demographic was males between 10 and 14, and my guess too is that I’m not the only one whose left wing leanings were reinforced by MAD. I subscribed to the magazine for years, and I think I was better for it.

I’m not fourteen anymore, of course, but, believe it or not, I’m currently a subscriber to the electronic edition. Two years ago I saw a print copy at the Northshire Bookstore in Manchester, Vermont. There on the cover was Alfred E. Newman making fun of Donald Trump, and I decided that the gang of idiots had to be supported if they continued to proselytize for a liberal point of view. Of course, satirizing Trump was difficult for them, since he does it himself so skillfully, and I will confess that I haven’t read it too often, because, as I said, I’m not fourteen anymore, but it’s important that present day fourteen year olds have all the advantages I had at that age.

Alas, MAD will be no more. The world has lost a force for good.

CAVEAT: My statement that MAD’s target audience was males between 10 and 14 was by no means intended to denigrate those of the female gender. One of life’s mysteries, at least as I have observed life, is the inability of people with two X chromosomes to appreciate fine humor such as that delivered by the Three Stooges and even, incredible as this may seem, Monty Python. I don’t know why women don’t appreciate the humor when Moe bonks Curly or Larry (or both) over the head, but they don’t. I suspect that this genetic deficiency extends to appreciation for the work of the gang of (all male) idiots at MAD. But look at it this way. Imagine how much worse off all of us would be if those idiots hadn’t helped deflect at least some white males away from Trumpism (I’m assuming here that black male MAD readers didn’t need that particular push).

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A twitter mystery

Tuesday, July 9, 2019

I am not a prolific Twitter user. Most of the tweets I read are second hand, reproduced in blog posts or mainstream media. Still, I understand that it can be a useful tool if used judiciously and well. But here’s what I can’t understand. The following is not an unusual series of events when a prominent person finds him or herself in hot water.

Alex Acosta, the Secretary of Labor, who, as a US Attorney, gave Jeffrey Epstein a highly suspect deal that essentially let him off the hook for abusing scores of young girls, took to Twitter today. It’s too much work for me to embed tweets, so I’ll just quote them.

The crimes committed by Epstein are horrific, and I am pleased that NY prosecutors are moving forward with a case on new evidence.

Now that new evidence and additional testimony is available, the NY prosecution offers an important opportunity to more full bring him to justice.

Let’s review the facts, shall we. These are ably set outby Michelle Goldberg in this morning’s Times:

Among the mysteries of the Epstein case are why powerful prosecutors of both parties treated him with such leniency. Alexander Acosta, now Trump’s labor secretary, was the federal attorney who oversaw the deal Epstein received in 2008. Though facing potential federal charges that could have put him away for life, Epstein was allowed to plead to minor state charges instead, an arrangement that was kept secret from his victims. He served 13 months in a county jail, where he got to spend six days a week in his office on work-release. In February, a judge ruled that Acosta’s team’s handling of the case violated the Crime Victims’ Rights Act. (Naturally, Acosta still has his job.)

After Epstein served his time, he had to register as a sex offender. Inexplicably, the Manhattan district attorney’s office, under Democrat Cyrus Vance Jr., asked a judge to downgrade Epstein’s sex offender status from Level 3, the most serious, to Level 1, the least. The judge, stunned, refused. “I am a little overwhelmed because I have never seen a prosecutor’s office do anything like this,” she said.

Read the rest of the column. It wasn’t just the genius; everyone who knew him was aware of Epstein’s hobby. As the recent search (pursuant to a warrant) also reveals, the evidence was hiding in plain sight. So, Acosta’s tweets are a pile of BS from start to finish.

Now, in the olden days, which some of us graying heads can still remember, a crook like Acosta (and it’s a shame he shares a name with a very good reporter) could have released those tweets as a statement to the press, which would have dutifully repeated them. The only blowback might have been in some opinion pieces, which, depending on timing, may not have come for a few days after the original bullshit was spewed.

Nowadays it’s different. Not only is the blowback immediate, it takes no prisoners, as the linked article demonstrates. Moreover, except maybe on Fox, it’s the blowback that gets most of the attention. Which brings me to my basic question: Why do it? My own lawyerly advice to Acosta would have been that he keep his mouth shut and his head down. Also, of course, he should resign, don sackcloth, and sit in a pile of ashes on the front steps of the Capitol, although, strictly speaking that’s not legal advice, but it might serve to keep his immortal soul from spending eternity in the fires of hell. In any event, he should stay away from Twitter, where the blowback might just make his time here on Earth seem like hell.

Filed in Lies and Lying Liars, Republican Corruption | | Comments (0)

What if Obama had done this, Episode Infinity (Plus One)

Friday, July 5, 2019

According to the AP article as headlined by the New London Day “Trump Flies high in ‘Salute to America’”, the subtitle reading “Staying on script, he honors the military; protestors say Fourth should be about unity”. The substance of the article is basically more of the same. The paper of record (that being the New York Times) has a similar article. I could find no mention in either of the fact that the Idiot in Chief said this:

 

Please note that it isn’t just the airports, which has (deservedly) gotten most of the attention on the internet. Just about ever fact in this video clip is untrue. The Revolutionary army was not named after George Washington and the Fort McHenry incident did not take place during the revolution. If Trump was sticking to the script, the script writers should be fired. More likely, the problem stems from a combination of his inability to read and his senescence, along with his general ignorance. (As an aside, why is it news that Trump allegedly stuck to a script. Isn’t that the least we can expect from an American president?)

Make no mistake, had Obama said any one of these things the grey lady would have taken immediate and prominent notice, as would the AP, and the blather on Fox would go on for weeks. (Incidentally, I’m curious as to whether the folks at Fox will try to put lipstick on this pig, or just ignore it. If lipstick, it will have to go on very thick and red.)

This is yet another step in the normalization of this “presidency”. The press merely looks the other way whenever this sort of thing happens. The headlines should have read: “Trump makes fool of himself on Fourth”, or something to like effect. You know.., the truth.

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Put this kid on the Supreme Court NOW!

Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Why waste time? He can get his law degree later.

And it’s criminal that the judge, who was perceptive enough to see that the kid has a future, was criticized for his acuity.

The 16-year-old girl was visibly intoxicated, her speech slurred, when a drunk 16-year-old boy sexually assaulted her in a dark basement during an alcohol-fueled pajama party in New Jersey, prosecutors said.

The boy filmed himself penetrating her from behind, her torso exposed, her head hanging down, prosecutors said. He later shared the cellphone video among friends, investigators said, and sent a text that said, “When your first time having sex was rape.”

But a family court judge said it wasn’t rape. Instead, he wondered aloud if it was sexual assault, defining rape as something reserved for an attack at gunpoint by strangers.

He also said the young man came from a good family, attended an excellent school, had terrific grades and was an Eagle scout. Prosecutors, the judge said, should have explained to the girl and her family that pressing charges would destroy the boy’s life.

So he denied prosecutors’ motion to try the 16-year-old as an adult. “He is clearly a candidate for not just college but probably for a good college,” Judge James Troiano of Superior Court said last year in a two-hour decision while sitting in Monmouth County.

No way he won’t get into Yale Law School, and he’ll be on the bench before you can say “Jack’s your uncle”, or whatever else it is you can’t say before something happens.

But Alas! The perceptive judge has been taken to task by his lessers:

Now the judge has been sharply rebuked by an appeals court in a scathing 14-page ruling that warned the judge against showing bias toward privileged teenagers.

Maybe there’s still hope. Maybe he can be sentenced to community service as a clerk for Brent Kavanaugh.

Filed in American Life, Dysfunction, Equal Justice | | Comments (0)

Really, this should stop

Tuesday, July 2, 2019

Donald Trump wants tanks rolling through the streets of Washington on the Fourth of July. He envies his pal in North Korea, and he wants the tanks as a tribute to himself. That is the long and short of it. Anyone who tells you different is lying.

In the print edition of this morning’s New York Times, this articleabout the tanks bears the following subtitle: Pride and discomfort over a homage to the military. 

It is not a homage to the military. Everyone with a brain knows that. You have to get deep into the article before you finally get to someone stating the obvious, and even then the point is not made that this is all about Trump and his ego.

Trump and the Republican Party have all but declared that the rules don’t apply to them. Well, actually some of them have declared it, just ask Kellyanne Conway if the Hatch Act applies to her. 

The media can’t play by the old rules, because the Republicans aren’t playing by them. It may have been okay to pretend to believe an obvious lie back in days of yore, but it’s dangerous these days. It’s time for the media to start calling things for what they are. In this case, it’s Trump wanting to be dictator for a day. You know, sort of a warm up for the future. A future, by the way, that the media helps deliver when it gives the least amount of credence to his lies.

Filed in Creeping Totalitarianism, Media | | Comments (0)

Further proof that there is no god

Sunday, June 30, 2019

At least not a kind and loving one, for how could he (I know god shouldn’t be gendered, but on the other hand, I doubt any female would want to be associated with this particular god) be setting the table for the reelection of the man whose sole objective appears to be the destruction of the American republic? 

Wait, I err. That is not his objective. His objective is his own exaltation. The destruction of the republic, along with the environment and the former world order, is, from his point of view, merely necessary collateral damage, or, if you are a Republican, merely the fulfillment of your wildest fantasies.

The stars are aligning to put him back in office for four more years, despite the fact that a hefty plurality of the American people loathe him.

Despite what you may have heard about the winners of the recent presidential debates, the powers that be still favor Joe Biden, who is busily finding ways to put his foot in his mouth and alienate the constituencies he needs to turn out. You know, the base. The latest is really hard to believe. He suggested, at a fundraiser hosted by a gay-rights leader, that five years ago if someone at a business meeting made fun of a gay waiter people would just let it go. This was his clumsy and tone deaf way of saying how far we’d come. The audience didn’t buy it. You have to hand it to Joe, no matter where he goes he finds a way to make himself look clueless. If we nominate him, he will lose, and we will probably nominate him.

Meanwhile the New York Times is hard at work painting liberals as extremists and exalting the Democratic right wing. You know, that would be the blue dogs, that prevent any progressive legislation and, incidentally, control the DCCC, which is working hard to make sure that the Democrats present a Republican-lite face to the nation. After all, that strategy has worked so well in the past.

Filed in Presidential Politics | | Comments (0)

So true

Thursday, June 27, 2019

Even if it’s the USS Biden, we have to get on it.

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Democrats need to take back the English language

Monday, June 24, 2019

A lot of disparate events over the last few days proving yet again that the Republicans have managed to hijack the English language. When they use a word it means exactly what they say it means, and when we use one, it no longer means what it means, unless we have Republican permission. Not only that, but in many cases, we accept this language perversion and propagate it ourselves.

I’ve noted many times before that the term “pro-life” is hardly the equivalent of the reality of the Republican position on abortion, or anything else. Yet not only do we let them use the term without pushback, many on the left use it themselves.

Even the term “white nationalist” also (wait for it)…whitewashes the reality. Americans, by and large, don’t consider the term “nationalist” to be pejorative. They do understand the shorter word “racist”, which fits the bill exactly.

Recently Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez made what should have been an uncontroversial characterization of the concentration camps in which we are incarcerating innocent children, to wit, that they are concentration camps. The right will have none of it, and few in the Democratic Party have come to her defense, much less join her in using a term that precisely describes what we are doing to these children.

It was a recent tweet by Matt Yglesias that got me thinking about this once again, as he pointed out how inappropriate it was for the press and Oregon public officials to refer to the armed thugs intimidating the Oregon legislature as a “militia”, their own self selected term for their criminal gang. Would either of those institutions extend the same privilege to an armed group of blacks demanding reparations? Once again, however, many on the left utilize the term without caveat, much less without using a more appropriate term, like “armed fascists”.

We need to take back the language. Part of the way you do that is by using a term over and over, just like the opposition. We generally have no need to use a term to mean anything we want it to mean. Generally speaking, we’re fine with the dictionary definitions. But repetition is all. Instead of running away from AOC, every Democrat in Congress should use the term “concentration camps” to refer to our concentration camps.

There are some signs of hope, though they come from unexpected quarters. A popular community knitting website, of all things, has banned statements that support Trump because “[s]upport of the Trump administration is undeniably support for white supremacy.” That’s clear thinking, and it’s about time the media, purportedly sane public officials, and elected Democrats followed their lead.

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Yet another open letter to the New London Day

Monday, June 17, 2019

Today’s headline reads: Iran to Blame in Ship Attacks. This is an assertion of fact. It is not borne out by the actual text of the Washington Post authored piece to which it is affixed. Since the Day is a newspaper, surely its editors are collectively aware of the fact that many people simply skim the headlines, or the first few paragraphs of an article. You do your readers and the nation a gross disservice by stating as fact something that is very much in doubt.

Many of us remember our history. We Remember the Maine!, which blew up of its own accord, an event which served as the pretext for war when American warmongers accused Spain of the deed. We remember Colin Powell lying to the United Nations about Saddam Hussein’s weapons of mass destruction, and the other lies the Bush Adminstration spread as a pretext for starting that needless war, including the assertion that Saddam somehow had something to do with the September 11th terrorist attack. We even remember recent history, though we know that’s against the rules of the punditocracy, and we are aware that the present administration is so mendacious it makes the Bush Administration seem like a model of probity. It is with that latter fact in mind that you might consider how to word a headline that accepts as fact the assertion of an administration which has now earned the right to have its every statement considered false until proven otherwise.

I have yet to see a coherent explanation of why this attack on third party shipping served Iran’s national interest. Why would Iran give a president it loathes, who is himself desperate to improve his dismal polling, a pretext for a war it would likely lose? Might it not be a good idea to consider other suspects, who might very much want to see their puppet re-elected and/or in a war with Iran? Just speculating, of course.

But I digress somewhat. Shame again on the Day for giving credence to the genius and his minions.

UPDATE: Check this out. If they had the goods on Iran they wouldn’t need to copy the Russians.

Filed in Lies and Lying Liars, Media | | Comments (0)

Now more than ever, follow Orwell’s rules

Friday, June 14, 2019

George Orwell posited six rules for good writing:

(i) Never use a metaphor, simile, or other figure of speech which you are used to seeing in print.

(ii) Never use a long word where a short one will do.

(iii) If it is possible to cut a word out, always cut it out.

(iv) Never use the passive where you can use the active.

(v) Never use a foreign phrase, a scientific word, or a jargon word if you can think of an everyday English equivalent.

(vi) Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous.

Today’s paper brought rules ii and iii to mind when I read this about Sarah Huckabee’s departure:

Sarah Huckabee Sanders, the White House press secretary, is leaving the Trump administration after a turbulent tenure marked by attacks on the media, dissemination of false information, and the near-disappearance of the daily press briefing. (Emphasis added)

And this:

While Sanders proved a more effective and composed carrier of Trump’s message than Spicer, she maintained the administration’s publicly antagonistic approach to reporters and regularly ran afoul of the facts. (Emphasis added again)

There is a three letter word that means the same thing as “dissemination of false information” and “ran afoul of the facts”. It begins with the letter “l” and ends with the letter “e”, with another vowel in between. (Okay, I just broke the rules too).

It would behoove the press to use that word more often. Keep in mind, 1984 was intended to be a description of a dystopia, not a utopia.

Just to be clear, I don’t believe rule vi is relevant here.

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